May 5, 2013

{Say 'Thank You' Before Anything Else}

Dear Bride-to-Be:
Don't forget to bring your grateful heart along when planning your wedding! It's so easy for couples to get caught up in the commercial glitz of wedding planning that no wonder some weddings appear to be done more "by the numbers" than "from the heart"....

And yes, numbers do play a big part in planning a wedding: the size of your guest list; how many attendants to have; the cost of the reception; the size of your wedding's carbon imprint; and etcetera! Yet, no matter how you "count the ways" (staying within your budget, being as "green" as possible, or including all of his relatives), you're busy counting while planning a wedding. So how to turn it around so that numbers aren't a source of stress, but simply a reminder of all your blessings?

It's not always easy to get the numbers to match your heart's desire in the simplest of circumstances, but it becomes especially challenging when planning a wedding. With weddings – these microcosms of real life – you're attempting to stuff so much into one event. And you do want to please everyone, even when you know that's impossible! Hmmmm. (I'm reminded of the quote from writer Eric Hoffer: "The hardest arithmetic to master is that which enables us to count our blessings.")
So consider this: 
  • What if planning your wedding became about "counting your blessings" first, then taking a head count second?
  • What if being grateful was always first on your "to do" list?
  • How would it change your life if everything followed "thank you"?
Whether you have only a dozen people at your wedding or you fill a grand ballroom, the spirit of your wedding comes from the gratitude in your heart and how you share it, yes? The thirteenth century German theologian Meister Eckhart said: "If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, 'thank you,' that would suffice." So if indeed saying "thank you" is like saying a prayer, then offer up your gratitude in all the ways you can, and the blessings of your wedding day will surely be abundant!
A beautiful bride is a woman who says "thank you" even without speaking a word.
Love. Listen. Let go.
...with love from Cornelia
[Photographs: David Willems]